The Spider King

So hopefully you caught my Devil’s Field Guide from last year’s PDC. You may not know, but I am on the PDC Core planning team in addition to my role for the most brutal Microsoft website, MIX Online. We are involved/responsible/to blame for everything from keynotes to sessions to website to bananas on the snack bars. I get to see a lot of things that I wish I could share here (and things I would like to forget). I am sure you have been checking out the PDC website to find out the latest on all things PDC, but I wanted to briefly talk to you about the things you won’t see in our travel brochures. Some of these are from the previous Devil’s Field Guide as they are still relevant a year later.

FYI, if you are easily offended, then go away. This isn’t for you.

Nighttime is the best time. If you plan to sleep during PDC09, then you are destined for an epic fail. Some of the best things happen at night and I am not talking about Hands-On Labs (although they are pretty awesome this year). For example, Wednesday night I will be judging the Iron Bartender where man squares off against machine to create a superior cocktail. Also, check out the Tweet Up where our very own @amyrc will be hosting and buying all the drinks you can muster. This is a chance to bring your significant other with you; I encourage it because I would like at some point next week to have human conversations rather than “I really think lambda statements combined with the power of Linq queries would be very valuable for building scalable, concurrent systems that can scale on Azure”.

If you can’t find anyone to hang with, go over to the rooftop at The Standard (but make sure you dress up beyond your “I breakpoint for WCF!” t-shirt) or go to the bar in the lobby of the Westin Bonaventure where you will see tons of Microsofties hanging out. Be sure to latch on to those Microsofties as they will more than likely pay for the drinks. They are awesome like that.

Standing in line is for suckers. I am amazed at how our species constantly finds itself mirroring farm animals like cattle, lined up in single file. Don’t stand in line for anything (except at bars, that is just a fact of life) at the PDC. For example, don’t register within the first hour of registration opening (unless you are hardcore!). Wait until the final hour where you can walk right up, get your badge and be on your way. Also, if there are giveaways from us, don’t stand in line. Again, we will have enough for everyone so its not as if we are going to run out. And if we do, you can be sure we will fix it ASAP. HERE IS THE EXCEPTION: If you want to register the morning of Day One, get out of bed as early as possible and get down there! Day One registration is masochistic if you wait the hour before the first keynote. You more than likely will miss the first few minutes if you wait.

If you need to decide between something, the answer is “go with the conversation”. Right now, there are folks who are feverishly working out their schedule so that they have every minute set up so they are either in a keynote, a session, etc. If you have an opportunity to talk to a real human, whether it be at a table in front of the Starbucks with folks from another company, or an expo partner in the big room, go with that instead. That networking will make the price of the conference worth it alone. We record all the sessions and keynotes and make them available after the event pretty quickly, you can catch up with them later.

Don’t spend all your time in your expertise. I always am surprised that there will be an attendee who has a laser-focus on a particular technology who reads every article & blog post, downloads the latest bits, has the e-mail of every developer on that team. Then goes on Twitter and says “Sat in Intro to XYZ at #PDC09, nothing new. #EPICFAIL!” Spread your wings and fly, try something new and different. If you want hardcore, either go to a session that specifically says it will talk about what you may not know or go talk to them at their booth and throw your questions at them.

Make sure you are talking to the right person. When you talk to a Microsoftie, ask what they do and get their card. It would be spectacular if all 90,000+ employees knew about every technical detail of every Microsoft technology, but it is not the reality. If someone doesn’t have an answer to your question, ask them who to speak with or if they will find someone who can help answer a question. They may not be able to do it right at the event (most employees have about 3-5 duties at the event and are busy in addition to their day jobs), but when they are back at the mothership they can track down any issues you may have had. Also, if you have their card, ping them again the week after if you have not heard from them (I have lost my list of Q’s at a previous conference and felt pretty bad about it).

Be cool, stay cool. I know, we should have done this vs. that. I know, if it was you, you would have done it a different way. Yes, we ran out of tuna sandwiches before you got up to the table. Yes, the speaker had a technical difficulty and could have just pre-compiled the binaries instead. We really do try to do our best. I know of no one that is “mailing it in”. Instead of immediately running off to Twitter with “OMG! They ran out of mustard for sandwiches. #EPIC! #FAIL! #BEYOND! #BELIEF!”, politely ask someone to help. Or send a simple e-mail to let us know (my e-mail is tho*lew*is at microsoft dotcom or you can hit me up on Twitter with @tommylee) and we will follow up. Also, if you are just frustrated beyond belief, go to the information desk or registration desk and they will try to help you.

Also, let me be clear: I am not a fan at all of anyone getting in the face of folks who work at the convention center. Those folks are just doing their job, so if you get mad, don’t take it out on them. They typically are told “don’t let anyone past this point without a badge that says x” and that IS their job. If you think you have the right to yell at them, you are wrong. In fact, say “hi” to them and smile at them once in a while. They do a good job are good people.

Keep your schedule loosey-goosey. Like I mentioned above, some folks are already planning out their attack plan for the schedule in advance. Here’s the thing, we typically hold back sessions because we want to announce things in the keynote that you have not heard about. So more than likely you will go “Oh snap! They just announce GeeWhiz v1.0 beta!” and have to figure out how to fit it into the tight schedule you already created. Also, you may go into a session that is overbooked with folks (we try our best to keep this from happening, but it does happen) or it just doesn’t turn out to be what you thought it was; have a backup session to go to or head over to the expo. I also suggest from last year:

PDC is a long haul of a conference. You of course will go to our session scheduler and double-book yourself every single session slot, you will plan to attend all pre- and post- events and do e-mail at night. Instead, take yourself a break, sleep in late one morning or just chill one of the afternoons. Think about all that you have seen and about how it will apply to your job back home. Also, take this time to rework your schedule. You probably thought you knew all that you wanted to see, but now that you have experienced it for a couple days you may change your strategy such as going to less “far in the future” sessions or go to more architectural discussions.

Again, don’t wear your kilt at the event. I wish I didn’t have to say this, but don’t be that guy. Wear it out to the after-parties. If you wear it at the event, you are just that guy.

Want to keep up with my crazy adventures at PDC09? Then follow me at http://twitter.com/tommylee. Also, please share in the comments below your recommendations for how to get the best out of a trip to PDC09. If you see me there (picture below), please stop me and say hello (if we are having drinks, I will buy)!

Scary Version of Me